Now That We’re Friends

Does Amancio Know His Worth?

Our new friend Amancio wants to ask his boss for a raise, but doesn't know how. Anne relates his dilemma to the larger issue of pay inequality. Gale sings. Caroline demonstrates how we can all directly communicate our desires. Gale sings again. Anne reminds us why RuPaul should have a guest starring role in every tv show. Caroline shows us how to pull off a good scam. Also, did we mention Gale sings?

All three friends try to boost Amancio up with the help of Dwight Schrute, McKayla Maroney and Cardi B. So enjoy this (partly) musical episode of Now That We're Friends! 

The recommendations that will raise Amancio up: 

The Art of Communicating” by Thich Nhat Hanh (book) Caro

“Rose’s Turn” Bernadette Peters at 2004 Tony’s (song) Gale

Dwight on The Office Pump Up (tv show scene) Gale

Insecure S2E1  (tv show) Anne

Watch sitcoms! Frasier and I Love Lucy (tv shows) Caro

Watch Veep and pay attention to Richard Splett (tv character) Caro

The Mary Tyler Moore Show (tv show) Gale

Broad City "Twaining Day" (tv show episode) Anne

“I Am A Very Productive Entrepreneur” by Mathias Svalina (book) Caro

“System of Ghosts” by Lindsay Tigue

Cardi B (everyone)

"Next Time Ask More Questions" by Naomi Shihab Nye(poem) Anne

Catch Me If You Can (film) Caro

The Inventor (documentary) Caro

My Favorite Murder Episode 185 “400 pealed potatoes” (podcast episode) Caro

The Werewolves of Millers Hollow (game) Caro

“I’ve got a golden ticket” (song) Gale

“Yes Anastasia” by Tori Amos (song) Anne 

McKayla Maroney: Visualizing The Perfect Vault Gale

Working Girl (film) Anne

Don’t suffer bullshit. (everyone)

"Everyone Poops" by Tarō Gomi (book) Caro and Gale

Wizard of Oz Reveal (film scene) Gale

Is Gabrielle Using Her Duck To Fill A Void?

Our new friend Gabrielle has lost her duck. This brings up a lot of feelings from Gale Caroline and Anne about our relationship with animals. This episode deals with transition and grief. Losing someone is hard, but ultimately we realize that if you love something you gotta let it go.

We take a trip down 90s nostalgia lane and reminisce on classic animal films such as Harry and the Hendersons, Free Willy, The Neverending Story and Homeward Bound. Gale confronts the truth about ET, Anne takes us down an animal instagram hole we don't ever want to crawl out of, and Caroline reads a poem that made our producer burst out in tears. 

This one's heavy folks! But ultimately it'll leave you cherishing all our relationships, human or otherwise.

Recommendations to fill Gabrielle's void:

"The Varieties of Scientific Experience" by Carl Sagan (book) Caro

"My Little Alien" by Kate Nash (song) Gale

ET (movie) Caro

Harry Potter (book) Caro

Anne Frank (author) Gale

The Sopranos (tv show) Caro

Bobs Burgers "Every Which Way But Goose" (tv episode) Gale

"Waiting For Happiness" by Nomi Stone (poem) Gale

"Dogs" (tv show) Anne

"The Cowboy" By James Tate (poem) Caro

"My New Pet" by James Tate (poem) Anne

"Flush" by Virginia Wolf (novel) Gale

Virginia Woolf’s quote about her dog (quote) Anne

"Afterglow" by Eileen Miles (book) Gale

@animalsdoingthings @catsdoingthings @jennifergarner (Books with Berdie) @simonsits @buttersoffical @weratedogs (Instagram accounts) Anne

@roundanimals Caro

Video of parrot playing peekaboo with cat -Subreddit party parrot Anne

The Contessa Wants To Greet The Day With A Beer. Should She?

Our new friend the Contessa of Kendall wants to know how early is too early in the day to have a beer. Working under the assumption that she's a responsible drinker, Anne, Gale and Caroline encourage the Contessa to let her freak flag fly. They also dissect the many ways the question could be interpreted. We travel back in time and across the globe to interpret all the ways people relate to alcohol. The general consensus is that it's situation dependent and when in doubt, pull the beer out!  

 

Contessa's home brew of recs:

The Supersizers Go (YouTube program) Gale

Drunk History FDR and Winston Churchill episode (tv show) Anne

"Sunday Morning Coming Down" by Kris Kristofferson (song) Caro

Drunk History - Kris Kristofferson Writes "Sunday Morning Coming Down"

Parts Unknown season 8 China (tv episode) Anne

No Reservations Ukraine ep (tv episode) Gale

Cooking For Jeffrey  (cookbook) “Guinness Brown Bread” Caro

The Diary of Samuel Pepys by Samuel Pepys (book) Gale

Big Night (film) Caro

Lunch Poems By Frank O'Hara (poems) Anne

Drunk History(show) Unsolved Mysteries and Dangerous Minds (episodes) Gale

The Gastronomical Me by M.F.K. Fisher (book) Caro

If Cynthia Has To Age, She Wants To Do It Gracefully.

Our new friend Cynthia wants to age gracefully. So buckle up everyone, it's time to face our own mortality! This is something Anne and Gale have thought about since they were small children, but we guess Cynthia's a late bloomer. Caroline finds comfort in growing older into a Julia Louis Dreyfus. Anne's older spirit animal is Dianne Keaton, and of course her mom! Gale and Caroline suggest Cynthia look inward and try taking stock of her happiness in her "golden years". Caroline gets zen, Gale teaches us how to tap dance with the help of Rachel Green and Anne tells Cynthia to make out with her life. Ultimately we all agree that youth is in the eye of someone who's young; and if you're not young, that's ok! Also, you're never too old to discover Ann Patchett and Oliver Sacks. 

 

Cynthia's fountain of recommendations to leave her youth behind: 

Harry Potter and the Sacred Text (podcast) Gale

Julia Louis Dreyfus (person) Caro

Veep (show) Caro

Inside Amy Schumer sketch “Last Fuckable Day” (sketch) Caro

Diane Keaton (person) Anne

Book Club (movie) Gale’s mom

Do the wild thing! Gale 

The Artist’s Way (book) Caro

Finale Episode of 30 Rock (tv episode) Gale 

Buddhism “Are you living out your values?” (religion) Caro

"This Is The Story Of A Happy Marriage" by Ann Patchett (collection of essays) Anne

"Love sustained" (essay in above book) Caro

Ann Patchett (person) Anne

The Gale experience of Ann Patchett (experience) Gale

“The One With The Fake Monica” Friends (tv episode) Gale 

Get into a hobby you’re bad at! (activity) Gale

"My life was the size of my life" (poem) The Beauty (book) Anne

"On the Move: A Life" by Oliver Sacks (book) Caro

"My Own Life" by Oliver Sacks (NYT  column) Caro

Oliver Sacks on RadioLab (radio program/podcast) Caro

"Seducing The Asparagus Queen" by Amorak Huey Gale

"The Immortalists" by Chloe Benjamin (book)  Gale

"The Prime Of Miss Jean Brodie" by Muriel Spark (book) Caro

Anne’s mom’s perspective. Anne

“An Old Story” By Tracy K. Smith (poem) Anne

"You Are Not Dead" by Wendy Xu (book) "We Are Both Sure To Die" page 66 (poem) Caro

Is Megan Made Of Girlfriend Material?

Our new friend Megan has never had a guy call her his girlfriend. She's been told she's not "girlfriend material" (ew). So she wants to know, what makes a girl girlfriend material? 

Once Anne, Gale and Caroline get over their initial eye roll, they discuss the actual materials that make up a girlfriend. They also talk about scaring men, how there's no one type of girlfriend and why your worth does not equal your relationship status. Not to mention the fact that serial killers have girlfriends. They give tips on how confidence can be an asshole deflector shield and how the idea of being "ladylike" is bullshit.  

Gale weighs in as the resident single host and asks "Why can't we just have a book?" while Caroline and Anne agree that a longterm relationship isn't exactly a cure all. Caroline also encourages Gale to write an essay called "Stevie Nicks: Deep In The Body". 

Here are the materials Megan needs to never be "girlfriend material":

Under The Skin (film) Caro

The Secret World of Alex Mack (tv show) Caro

"Material Girl" by Madonna (song) Anne

"Not About Love" by Fiona Apple (song) Gale

"Strong Enough" by Sheryl Crow (song) Gale

"Strong Enough" by Sheryl Crow and Stevie Knicks (music video) Gale

Stevie Knicks duets Gale

"Aok" by Karen Kilgariff (song) Gale

My Favorite Murder (podcast) Caro

Voyager by Jenny Lewis (album) “Late Bloomer” (song) “Just One of the guys” (music video) Caro

"No Scrubs" by TLC (song) Anne

"Tantrum" by Stella Corso (poetry collection) “Thank God The Stars” (poem) “What It Is” (poem) Anne

Shrill (tv show) Caro

"Her Body And Other Parties" by Carmen Maria Machado (book) Gale

"Middlemarch" by George Eliot (novel) Gale

Little Women (film) Anne

Caro’s fantasy version of Phantom of the Opera where she leaves them both Caro

"Being A Girl" by Shannon Burns (poem) "Preserving The Old Way of Life" (book) Caro

"Virginity" by Anna Swir (poem) Gale

"The Greatest" by Sia and Kendrick Lamar (song) Gale

"The Member of the Wedding" by Carson McCullers (novel) Caro

"Men Explain Things to Me" by Rebecca Solnit (essay) Anne

Insecure (tv show) Caro

Veronica Graduated. Now What?

Our new friend Veronica is switching career paths. She began college at 18 on a pre-med track and is now about to graduate from a writing Master's program in her late 20s.

Caroline, Anne and Gale can relate! They discuss the anxieties that come with changing things up later in life, such as imposter syndrome. 

They define wisdom, rethink the advantage of an academic background and what it takes to be a "Working Girl" and "Nasty Gal" with self-confidence. They can't ignore the societal struggles of aging as a woman and the differences between your 20s and 30s. They gush over their favorite female authors, who all happen to write honestly about insecurities, the "fairy tale" of job searching and eventually getting a baby and cowboy boots, whatever that means to you. 

Not to spoil the ending, but the moral of the episode is there's no such thing as a straight arrow line to your career.

Oh, and they also come up with appropriate phrases that incorporate... feet? You have to listen to get it. 

Veronica's recipe for Julia Child's Career Path a l'Orange: 

 “Working Girl” (movie) Anne

“Let The River Run” (music video) Anne

“One Day We’ll All Be Dead And None Of This Will Matter:Essays” by Scaachi Koul( book) Gale

Baby Cobra by Ali Wong (stand-up special) Caroline

Read Roxane Gay (author) “Bad Feminist” Anything she’s written on women and feminism “I approach things with a dangerous level of confidence….” Anne

Channel youth! Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season 2 Episode 4 Caroline

Hocus Pocus (film) Gale

“My Life In France” by Julia Child (book) Gale

Julie and Julia but just Julia (film) Anne

Kathryn Joosten’s late career Gale

List of people who didn’t start until later in life (Andrea Bocelli and Grandma Moses) Anne

Without Fail (podcast) Caro

The Good Wife (tv show) Anne

The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt (tv show) Gale

Isa the truck named Isadore  by Amanda Nadelberg (book) “Ugtred” (poem) Caro

Slouching Towards Bethlehem by Joan Didion (book) “Goodbye to all that” Gale

“How to Triumph Like A Girl”by  Ada Limon (poem) Anne

Brother’s Grimm fairytales Caro

Star Trek Next Generation (tv show episode) “Peak Performance” Gale

Murder She Wrote (tv show) “A Murder Among Friends" (episode) Gale

Juanita Hits The Debate Stage Or Um, The Dinner Table

On a very special episode of Now That We're Friends, our new friend Juanita is fighting with family over political differences. She asks Caroline, Anne and Gale for advice on how to find peace and perspective when surrounded by conflict. Gale has an imaginary argument about shrimp. Caro talks about the burn out that comes with anger. Anne has a moment of uncertainty that leads to her expressing her love of watching Kevin Bacon dance out his frustrations in an abandoned warehouse. There's also plenty of tips on how to deal with family about differing ideologies, including watching unifying shows like Parks and Recreation, arguing alone in the shower and making up songs to the tune of "Love Shack". They also try to come up with a way to hack Queer Eye. 

If all else fails, there's always stepping out into a field somewhere and avoiding responsibility. But while you're there, you might as well check out...

Juanita's "political strategy":

“I Never Figured How to Get Free” by Donika Kelly (poem) Gale

“An Atlas of the Difficult World” by Adrienne Rich (poetry book) “What Kind Of Times Are These” (poem) Anne

“The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao”by Junot Díaz (book) Caroline

“Island Born” by Junot Díaz (book) Caroline

“Dreaming in Cuban” by Cristina García (novel) Caroline

“Hubble Photographs After Sappho” Adrienne Rich (poem) Gale

“Don't Sweat the Small Stuff and It's All Small Stuff: Simple Ways to Keep the Little Things from Taking Over Your Life” by Richard Carlson(book) Anne

Wildlife conservation and the art of letting go | Geraldine Morelli | TEDxWandsworth (Ted Talk) Gale

Two Dope Queens (podcast) Caroline

Parks And Recreation (tv show) Gale

“Hope in the Dark” by Rebecca Solnit (book) Gale

So Many White Guys (podcast) Caroline

American Sonnets for My Past and Future Assassin by Terrance Hayes (book) Anne

The Bees Make Money in the Lion by Lo Kwa Mei-en (book) Caroline “The Alien Crown”

King Me by Roger Reeves (book) “Southern Charm” Caroline

Antibalas (Band) Caroline

“Borderline (An Ode to Self Care)" by Solange Knowles (song) Gale

“Didn't Cha Know” by Erykah Badu (song and music video) Gale

Accomplish a small task. Caroline

30 Rock “Retreat to Move Forward” S3 E9 (tv show) Caroline

Buying or donating something in someone's name. Gale

Footloose (movie) Anne

Queer Eye (tv show) Caroline

The Carrying: Poems by Ada Limón (book) Gale

Benadictia's Past DMs Her In The Present

Our new friend "Benadictia" isn't sure how to respond to an ex boyfriend who wants to get back touch. Caroline, Gale and Anne discuss their own experiences with moving on from unfavorable past experiences and men's expectations of women in general, but especially in pop culture. They also suggest great 90s movies, punk songs, a Reba McEntire music video that should be required viewing at every Law School and a very necessary Rihanna quote to help "Benadictia" look toward what's ahead of her instead of what's behind. 

Benadictia's pop culture prescription for talking to an ex: 

“Your Ex-Lover Is Dead” by Stars (song) Caroline

“Shitlist” by L7 (song) Anne

“Take it Back” by Reba McEntire (music video) Gale

“A Girl Walks Home Alone At Night” (movie) Caroline

“Now And Then” (movie) Anne

“Never Been Kissed” (movie) Caroline

“10 Things I Hate About You” (movie) Caroline

“A Letter To my Younger Self” by Ambar Lucid (song) Gale

“I’m So Fine: A List of Famous Men and What I Had On” by Khadijah Queen (book of poetry) Gale

“Awe” by Dorothea Lasky (book) The Second Lesson, The Second Appurtenance (poem) Anne

“Fates and Furies” by Lauren Groff (novel) Caroline

“The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel” (tv show) Caroline

“Movin’ On” by Brandy (song) Gale

“Shrill: Notes from a Loud Woman” by Lindy West (book) Anne

“Why Does the Sun Shine? (The Sun is a Mass of Incandescent Gas)” by They Might Be Giants (song) Caroline

“The only time I’m looking back, is when my ass is in the mirror” by (maybe) Rihanna (quote) Gale

Brigette's Motivated To Ask For Motivation

Our new friend Brigette is in need of motivation. She's happy with her life, but thinks there may be some things she can do to make it better. The problem is she's not motivated to change much. 

Luckily, her friends Caroline, Gale and Anne give recommendations to help put a fire in Brigette's belly. They also talk about their own struggles with motivation, how hard it is to get up at night to pee, a dating app for people who like to eat chicken tenders, how women's ambition is depicted in 90s movies, seasonal depression, pump up playlists, mattress canoes, and the thing that motivates them the least, math! 

Brigette's pop culture prescription for lack of motivation: 

“The Idiot” by Elif Batuman (novel) Anne and Caroline

Neapolitan Novels by Elena Ferrante (4 novels) Anne and Gale

The Hours Soundtrack (album) Gale, 

Gale Get Up (playlist on Spotify) Gale

Zeno's paradoxes (philosophical problems) Gale

"McDonald’s is Impossible” Chelsea Martin (poem) Gale

“Friends” Season 1, Episode 4 “The One With George Stephanopoulos” Gale

“The Irrationalist” by Suzanne Buffam (poetry collection) “The New Experience” (poem) Anne

"Don't confuse, comfort with happiness"- Dean Karnazes (inspirational quote) Gale

The National - “Bloodbuzz Ohio” (song) Gale “I owe money to the money to the money I owe”

The National - “Slow Show” (song) Caroline “I’ve gotta get my shit together, I’ve gotta gather my shit”

Election (film) and Big Little Lies (tv show) also Reese Witherspoon films in general Caroline

“Lessons on Expulsion: Poems” by Erika Sánchez (book) Gale

“I Am Not Your Perfect Mexican Daughter” by Erika Sánchez (book) Gale

Follow Erika Sánchez on Twitter Gale

Also, stay off social media. Gale

“Modern Romance” by Aziz Ansari Caroline

Order Mama’s Tenders at Mama Iguana's. Caroline

“Girl on Fire” by Alicia Keys (song) or any pump up song Anne

Take a daily dose of Cardi B (music and social media) “Get that caching” Caroline

Lizzo Anne

Pick up a part time job for a particular reason to gain a sense of control. Gale

Make up a “messy mentor” (Karen Kilgariff and Mrs. Maisel) Gale

“Let go of who you think you’re supposed to be; embrace who you are.”- Brené Brown (quote) Gale

DEAR SUGAR, THE RUMPUS ADVICE COLUMN #86: TINY REVOLUTIONS (column) “Real change happens on the level of the gesture.”  Gale

A haircut. Caroline

“The Motivation Myth: How High Achievers Really Set Themselves Up to Win” by Jeff Haden (book) Bradley Whitford quote “In order to fall in love with the product, you have to fall in love with the process”  Gale

Chef’s Table (tv show) Caroline

Jiro Dreams of Sushi (documentary) Caroline

Chef’s Table Volume 4:Pastry Episode 1 “Christina Tosi” (tv episode) Gale

“It Is Daylight” by Arda Collins (poetry book) “With A Voice In Front Of You” (poem) Caroline

Lizzo’s Asschela promo instagram videos Caroline

Be Usher. Everyone

 

Now That We're Friends Trailer

Meet Caroline Cabrera, Anne Holmes and Gale Thompson! These three best friends met ten years ago while studying Poetry in Massachusetts. They all now live in different cities, but when they're together they give each other advice by recommending things to watch, read, or listen to that'll help them through a problem. Now they're sharing their recommendations with new friends who send in their questions. If you enjoyed the trailer for Now That We're Friends, listen for our very first episode on Monday, August 12, 2019.